I was lucky enough to get away for a few days to a festival in the Black Forest of Colorado with folks from my spiritual community.
We arrived at the location, got all checked in and settled on Wednesday. In the mddle of the night, I woke up and happened to look out the window to see a pretty fair amount of snow on the trees outside my window! It’s May! We left our further North home in Spring, only to end up back in the Winter! What a funny surprise!
Yet, unlike how I might feel at home, I laughed to myself that our Gods have a great sense of humor and went back to sleep. In the morninng, we were greeted with a late Spring, Winter wonderland. Yet, I felt myself feeling oddly relaxed. I knew I didn’t have anywwhere far to go, and only a task that I signed up for on my agenda that was the equivalent of a couple of blocks away.
While it was hard to accept the return of the cold and snow, it was somehow ok. I wasn’t upset or worried about things as I might normally have been. In fact, I actually allowed myself to enjoy what seemed to be forming up as an adventure!
To be among my spiritual community is a whole different experience compared to what I deal with in the outer world. Among my community, I am revered as an elder, loved and respected. I am seen as wise and one to go to for guidance and help. I am a priestess who is called upon to lead parts of rituals or whole rituals on occasion, because my 30+ years of knowledge is valuable. I have a place, I am seen as having a place.
As a Black woman, and an elder in this world, it is–was such a treasure to feel this sense of connection and to feel for a few days that feeling of being spiritually reinvigorated, so that I could see my way through to what was/is important.
I have much more clarity than I have in recent days, though it’s often difficult to see the way. I am heartened by a new sense of personal freedom that comes from a sense of fearlessness in the manner of Trungpa. Fearlessness doesn’t necessarily mean absence of fear, but a willingness to keep going into things no matter what might be the outcome. It is also about, from my perspective, doing exactly what you need to be doing without worrying about what others think, or what you think will happen.
I am grateful for these insights, and sincerely am grateful to Joy and Jo and all who created an environment where we could stretch and learn and find our way back home–wherever that might be.